Mom - Wednesday

What a great day today. It seems strange to say that in the midst of what's going on, but it was a day that I will hold in my heart. Noel, Mike and Cathie's parents came by tonight. Each spent about an hour hanging out and talking with my Mom, reminiscing and talking about what's going on in their lives. Cathie's parents and I sat with my Mom remembering back to Cathie and I's engagement and wedding. Even in the midst of pain meds, my Mom is sharp and her memory is working pretty good most of the time. She amazes me with the things she remembers. I setup a video camera in the room and I've been taping my Mom in moments as she tells some of her stories, to preserve them somehow. Every word that comes from her mouth is filled with joy, graciousness and thankfulness. She could choose to be so bitter and angry, but instead she is filled with Joy to the core. She has blessed so many people's lives, but she looks at it from the perspective of how many more people have blessed her.

In the midst of today there were kids running around, people all over, laughing, crying and reminiscing. I hate thinking of a world without my Mom. She's always carried the torch for our big family gatherings that we do all of the time, and I can't imagine a get together without her. We are a family of stories, though. It's part of who we are. We love to tell stories about what's happened in our lives, which is probably why my siblings and I all have blogs. The stories and pictures that we have will keep my Mom's memory alive for a long time. My Mom's friend Sherry is a part of our family who tells the stories of my Mom with just a joy and laughter that you can't help but smiling. We've already told her that whether she wants it or not, she's in the family - and as Will can attest to - once you're in, you never get out.

The present moment is great, but when I think forward to where this is going, it's going to be tough. I can't think about it without crying. It's so hard to talk about what my Mom's funeral will be like, seeing her obituary that she's already written. It's a reality, though. My Mom described the dress she wanted to buried in to Susan, who instead said she had other ideas for an outfit, and proceeded to bring out this ugly flannel jumper:

We just finished up sitting with my Mom again, telling stories, laughing and joking. Beth, Will, Jon, Dad and I stayed up until 12:15am, sitting around Mom's bed talking about everything from our family values to funny stories from my Mom and Dad's days together. We heard stories about how bad of a cook my Mom was when she first married my Dad to retelling the stories of how i caught my room on fire with fireworks and Jon had to help me hide the mess. We talked about heaven and what and who she'll see. We laughed so much tonight, all in the midst of grilling Will on why he hasn't popped the question to Monaca and set a date.