Willapalooza

For years we've been planning Will's bachelor party. At one point we even considered buying him a mail-order-bride in order to bring the event to fruition. We were thrilled for many reasons when he got engaged to Monaca, one of them being having the bachelor party. We've even gone so far as to create a web site as we're planning the event and having t-shirts made for the event. From the beginning, the event has been planned for Las Vegas and the vision just keeps getting bigger and better over time. We could do it anywhere, but Vegas has so much to offer in terms of a fun atmosphere, gambling and warm weather. Will has been very clear from the beginning on the ground rules, but he posted the following post on the Willapalooza blog to set the ground rules for the event. I think it's very noble, and damn funny. I think he means all of it, except for the part about the hookers.

I know that Brad will be "damned ashamed" of me for putting my expectations on the blog. As most of us know, Brad's philosophy is, "expectations are disappointments waiting to happen." Although I love the movie Bachelor Party, I don't envision us recreating any of the scenes from the movie... well, maybe there will be a dead horse in Dave's room.

First of all, I expect us all to have a REALLY good time. I have never been to Vegas, so I am looking forward to taking it in with all of you.

Secondly, I expect that we are going to be mindful of the cost of activities and other stuff. I greatly appreciate all of your generosity and I would be heartbroken if anyone came away from this trip in financial difficulty.

Even though we are going to "Sin City" I don't plan on going off the debauchery deep-end. Yes, we will be gambling and drinking, but I don't plan on you guys having to scrape me up off the pavement. Face it, someone will injure themselves trying to help me up, and that isn't going to make the trip fun for anyone.

This is going to be a "skin free" expedition. I'm sure that there are plenty of beautiful strippers and hookers in Vegas, but I'm not planning on hanging out with any of them. I'm sure that there are plenty of educational films available at the hotel, but I won't be watching any of them. I don't say this to be preachy, but I really want to start my marriage by honoring Monaca and honoring God.

Brad will say something inappropriate during the trip. At that point, he will be fitted with a red ball gag for the remainder of our stay. Don't worry, we'll run a tube down his nose from a Budweiser bottle.

Ted will escalate an incident into either something extremely embarrassing for everyone around him, or that requires a trip to the hospital. He is a big fan of Ronald Reagan's MAD policy (Mutually Assured Destruction). I'm pretty confident that we will be asked to leave at least one casino because of Ted... hopefully not the one we're staying in!

We will all awake one morning to find Dave passed out in the hallway, completely naked. This won't be due to excessive drinking... its just how Dave rolls.

Compromising photographic evidence will be gathered throughout the trip. All I have to say is that the first one who falls asleep is asking for trouble!

I can't wait to go, and what I'm really looking forward to most of all, is a chance to spend time with all of you in celebration of my upcoming marriage to the most wonderful woman in the world... Monaca.