Ouch

Thanks to Mark for this quote from one of his annual posts:

The way we are with each other is the truest test of our faith. How I treat a brother or sister from day to day, how I react to the sin-scarred wino on the street, how I respond to the interruptions from people I dislike, how I deal with normal people in their normal confusion on a normal day may be a better indication of my reverence for life that the anti-abortion sticker on the bumper of my car. - Brennan Manning

Sigh. This hits home. If I look at the way I've dealt with a few different people recently - some to their face, and some behind their back, this shows me just how far I have to go in where I'm at as a follower of Jesus and the reality of my faith. It's almost easier for me to respond with love in the rare encounter with a wino than the repeated interaction with an annoying customer or heated argument with a family member. If I look at the long-term view on how I treat people since I took my discipleship seriously, I've made huge strides. I'm less self-centered and more other-focused, I don't think as much of myself and I see the world as less black and white, and cut people more grace than ever before.

That's all well and good until tough times hit. I guess people are like toothpaste, and when they're squeezed, what's inside comes out. When I look at some of the road-bumps of how I've dealt with people in my life over the past few weeks, I don't feel like I'm quite there yet, to put it mildly. What a cool thing that I have people in my life who know me intimately and hold me accountable, encourage me and challenge me to grow beyond where I think I'm at. Beyond that, I have a God who continues to push me and grow me beyond my comfort zone. So I've got that going for me, which is nice.