Wednesday, September 24, 2003

I spent the last 24 hours thrasing on something that in the big picture wasn't worth it. I learned things about myself, but I am physically and emotionally beat from the whole experience. I don't mind conflict, but I like to move through it quickly and not have it linger on. Conflict at it's worst for me is when it's personal, and I take most conflict very personally, even in work situations. I have pretty close relationships with many of the people I work with - on a project, I'll spend 60 hours in a week with some of them for months at a time. So anyways, in this particular situation I felt like I'd been hung out to dry by people that I consider friends, and a person I really respect in our company. I was pissed off, I was sad, and I was angry. Luckily, my boss (Bill Belanger) happens to also be a good friend of mine, and he did an amazing job coaching me through a lot of this. He knows me better than most people do, and he understands how I process things and how I can respond, for better or for worse. Bill is a guy who I've worked with for almost 9 years in different capacities, and has been instrumental in getting to where I'm at today in the company. One by one, I've been talking one-on-one with the people involved, trying to gain some understanding and resolution to things. As I do that, it's like a weight is slowly lifted off my shoulders.

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