Key West Trip

Cathie, Jon and Beth arrived in Miami around 1:30am on Friday morning. I picked them up, we spent the night in Miami and then headed down to Key West. The drive down is beautiful. On the way down we couldn't help but stop to see this giant road-side lobster. It was not real (hence the large steal beams underneath).

We stopped at a few cool places along the way, including the No Name Bar in No Name Key. It's a dive in the middle of nowhere and there are about 70,000 dollar bills covering the walls and ceilings.

Jon and I both left our marks.

We got to our hotel around 4, staying at the Crown Plaza right on the main drag, Duvall Street. We hung out by the pool relaxing before heading out that night. We were right across the street from Fat Tuesdays, and two blocks away from Kelly Caribbean Bar home of the greatest key lime margaritas ever, not to mention some really amazing wings. (They've got a fantastic happy hour there from 4-7).

Jon wanted to go to Key West because he'd heard it was full of cats. We didn't see a single cats, but there were roosters everywhere. Jon really, really, really hates all birds. There was guy who would let you get your picture taken with a snake or parrot on Duvall street. As we walked by, Jon was so taken with the snake that he didn't notice the birds - until they shrieked and Jon about poo'd himself.

On Saturday, we took it easy and hung out by the pool. It wasn't a huge pool, but it was nice. I'm not one whose big on sitting still, so I went for a run around the island. It was beautiful out and I figured I'd get some sun, so I didn't wear a shirt. As I got to the end of my run, I headed down Duvall street where I ended up in the middle of a Drag Race. The Drag Race consisted of a series of races between drag queens, in full gear. I'm pretty sure I won the race.

In the evening, we'd head down to Mallory Square to watch the sunset. Everyone on the island congregates there to watch the sunset and the entertainers. You get to see dogs walking on tight-ropes, one-man-bands, and Crazy Cat Guy, who I'll talk more about later.

It's a great place to people watch. We saw long neck guy on two different days (doesn't he look like Brad from behind?)

We saw reall-bad-sunglass-tan-line guy there, and then crazy cat lady below (her shirt reads "Cat A-Holic"). We thought should could be Anne V. in 10 years.

There are all these crazy statues around Mallory Square, and it never got old to pose with these.

My favorite pic is of the tourist taking a picture, with Jon and I mooning the camera. Genius, really.

As you wander Duvall Street, you see a ton of t-shirt shops, filled with some pretty funny t-shirts, most you couldn't wear anywhere but Key West. Jon was couldn't decide between the "I love weiners" shirt and the Kitty Cat shirt. There were some very funny ones that aren't quite suitable for this page.

Key West is full of some great bars. You can walk from bar to bar with your drink in hand and go to about any kind of bar you can imagine, all with the same laid back additude. Our favorites were Irish Kevins (hilarious singer and sing-alongs), Hog's Breath (great band, but packed) and Sloppy Joes (awesome bands with sing-along) and Big 'Uns, with the guy pictured above. This guy is as cool as I hope to be when I turn 50. He was a great singer and hilarious to listen to.

On Sunday we decided to spend the day at sea. Great idea unless you have 20-30mph winds. We got one of the package deals through Fury, which included Parasailing, Jet Skiing, Snorkeling, Kyaking and other water stuff. I brought my camera along and got some video of the event, not to mention a picture of my toes (which look a little odd in this picture). I'm pretty sure Cathie got herself a pedicure just in case we did this.


After parasailing, they took us out to this virtual island. We went jet skiing and then you could climb on these giant water apparatuses. This pyramid on the right was a bear to get up after swimming what seemed like a mile in choppy seas, only to slip off the side and almost rack myself on a rope they have strategically positioned at the bottom. Good times.

The waves were pretty brutal so snorkeling was a lot of work and not all that much fun. I was out for a while, following this big 'ol barracuda along (I even sang the song through my snorkel to see if he recognized it. He didn't.) On the ride back, they crack a keg of beer to wash the salt water out of your system. Good for me, not so good for the people who'd been throwing up over the side due to the waves. Luckily, Beth's a doctor and had given us all some good 'ol anti-nausea medicine fit for cancer patients.

One highlight was this guy's tattoo... Read it closely to check out the typo.

I gotta say, I love Key West! It's the most relaxed, laid back place you can go. It's beautiful and like being in the Caribbean, just without the poverty and crime. The bars and the people are awesome and it doesn't have the touristy feel, even though it's still there. We had lots of late nights where even at 2am the bars and people will still hopping. Staying right on Duvall street was nice, but in the future, I might stay a few blocks off in one of the smaller houses/cabins/bed-and-breakfasts.

On Monday morning we headed North and drove back to Miami for our last full day in Flordia.

You can see the rest of the pictures from the trip here.

The Soloist and Me

Cathie and I went to see the movie The Soloist (spoiler alert) tonight. (Some might say this is the story of Ken Buck and Chris Sloan, except Chris Sloan plays the Cello) If you haven't seen the previews, it's about a reporter, Steve Lopez, who befriends a homeless man, Nathaniel Ayers, who is also a musical prodigy. The movie deals with the relationship between the two of them as the reporter is faced with the world of the homeless and trying to help him out.

It was a tough movie to watch, but a good movie. It just hit close to home in a lot of ways. It showed a pretty stark reality to the homelessness in L.A. It showed how bad it is and how there are no easy answers to fix things for them. Throughout the movie, Lopez wrestled with the issue of how close to get to Ayers and how to help him. He wrestled with what it looked like to exploit the guy through his newspaper column for his own publicity verses saving him from the life he lived and his schizophrenia. Lopez did great things for Ayers because he saw the potential in him, but in the end, most of those things went wrong even though done for mostly the right reasons.

This movie hit me from a lot of angles. It struck me because I'm a person who likes to help others, mostly for the right reasons. I'm a guy who all day long tries to fix problems - problems my employees have, customer's problems and larger strategic problems. It's what I do. Often times I want to translate those same problem solving abilities to my wife, kids and friends. It often comes across as harsh, judgmental or self-righteous. While I'm a guy who appreciates feedback and solutions in my own life, and try and apply the same solutions to things going on with me - the idea doesn't necessarily translate well beyond my own life. My motivations are mostly good for wanting to help others because I see such greatness in them, and I know what it would take to resolve the issue in my own life.

I could so relate with Lopez as he wrestled with seeing the potential in Ayers and wanting to provide Ayers with solutions: notoriety for his talent, medication for his schizophrenia, a room to get him off the streets. He wanted to save this guy, to fix him, and was frustrated with the end results short-term because at the end of the day, he learned (like I've learned time and time again) that you can't really control anyone else.

I see the potential in my friends and family, see what they could be and try and "fix" them in the vision that I have for them. I've gotten way better at carrying the tension of loving someone where they're at verses trying to help them out, but I'm not there yet. I think I'll always be the guy who challenges my friends, but I've learning to incorporate more humility and patience into the mix over the years.

There's a line at the end of the movie where Lopez's wife says to him about his relationship with Ayers, 'Stop trying to save him. Just be his friend and show up'. I think that's been one of the biggest lessons for me in my friendships. At the end of the day, love is what I've seen really change people. Action plans in the context of love, not treating them like a project.

In the closing minutes of the movie, the writer talks about how he stopped looking at the prodigy as a project and started being a friend. He shares that he really hasn't fixed his friend, but maybe together they've made some progress. In the end, I guess that's what I've learned with the friends of mine and my wife and kids I've tried to "fix" over the years. Whether it's a homeless guy or any other guy with problems, not seeing them as a project, but being a friend and just showing up for them goes a long ways.

Planting Grass Seed and Junior High Kids

My lawn sucks. I have a neighbor whose lawn is beautiful, and makes mine look that much worse. Every year I make the token effort to plant grass seed in the bare spots in my lawn. I rake the area, put down top soil and seed, cover it up and water and hope it grows. It rarely does. Most years, three months after planting the seed, I look out over my lawn and it looks even worse than it did in the spring. Almost nothing has grown, I've got moles and some kind of crazy grass disease.

When I looked at my lawn today, I saw these giant tall areas of grass where three years ago I'd planted grass seed which had finally decided to grow. When it was finally time to grow, it grew really well. For some reason this made me think of Junior High Youth Ministry. I've been working with Junior High Kids in my church's youth group for about twelve years. In that time, I've gotten to know hundreds of kids. I have the pictures pop up on my screen saver of kids from way back and I'm humbled by how many kids I've gotten to know.

Non-sequitor alert:

I was kicking off a Project 311 youth pastors lunch in front of a group of about 100 youth pastors. What I meant to say was, "You're here because your life was impacted by a youth leader somewhere, and now here you are, impacting the lives of kids." What I instead said was, "You're probably here because as a kid, you were touched by your youth leader, and now hear you are, touching kids yourself." Shinn, Butler, Phil and Tim were all at the front table laughing until they peed themselves.

At the end of the day, I'm far from the greatest youth pastor around. I had no idea what I was doing 12 years ago when I began, and I probably have less of an idea today. I'm not in any real capacity today now that we've got a full-time/part-time youth pastor now who does all the real work while I just get to show up and have fun. My mantra to my leaders has always been this:

At the end of the day, the kids in our youth group will remember almost nothing that we tell them. What they will remember is that you liked them, you laughed with them, had fun with them, were interested in them, listened to them and spent time with them, AND that you had an authentic relationship with Jesus that leaked out of you at every turn. At some point they will connect those things when they come to the crossroads in their life at the decision point to follow Jesus and it will play a role."

I assume that after the seeds are planted that all of the things I listed above are fertilizer and water, and that I while I may see little blades of grass sprout up, the big growth is coming way down the line. I know that at the end of the day, God is way bigger and smarter than me and he isn't dependent on me, but he'll use me somehow. It helps me not lose heart when I hear about them being involved in all sorts of crazy stuff, because I've seen so many of my kids get through the crazy stuff, and come out on the other side with an amazing, dynamic faith. One that I got to play some small role in.

Maybe Jesus really knew what he was talking about with his whole seed story he told:

A farmer planted seed. As he scattered the seed, some of it fell on the road and birds ate it. Some fell in the gravel; it sprouted quickly but didn't put down roots, so when the sun came up it withered just as quickly. Some fell in the weeds; as it came up, it was strangled among the weeds and nothing came of it. Some fell on good earth and came up with a flourish, producing a harvest exceeding his wildest dreams. (You can read his explanation of it here)

Now if only I could get my grass to look good.

Was Jesus a Liberal?

I've had a tough time reconciling my faith with my gut around Obama's taxation and around nationalized health care. There's a part of me that recoils when I hear about this mass taxation on the wealthy and a redistribution of money to those with less and a blank check for health care for everyone. I think of all of the leeches in society and those that want to sit back and do nothing while others work hard, like a single Mom I work with who kills her self day in and day out to be successful at Xerox while taking care of her two boys.

As part of the Riv Text reading program, I was reading 2 Corinthians 8. I read it, skimming over the first time, and then for some reason went back and read it again

¹³Our desire is not that others might be relieved while you are hard pressed, but that there might be equality. ¹⁴At the present time your plenty will supply what they need, so that in turn their plenty will supply what you need. Then there will be equality, ¹⁵as it is written: "He who gathered much did not have too much, and he who gathered little did not have too little."

I wasn't sure exactly what it meant. At face value, it seemed like a very hard thing that Paul was asking at the church of Corinth. It reads almost like socialism, where those with much give to those with little. As I typed that last line, my first thought was, "Huh. Isn't that the calling of the church? Isn't the church called to take care of the poor, the widows the orphans? (James 1:26-27):

Anyone who sets himself up as "religious" by talking a good game is self-deceived. This kind of religion is hot air and only hot air. Real religion, the kind that passes muster before God the Father, is this: Reach out to the homeless and loveless in their plight, and guard against corruption from the godless world.

Isn't the church called to be a level playing field, in the same way God has leveled it out for us? (Galatians 3)

^28-29In Christ's family there can be no division into Jew and non-Jew, slave and free, male and female. Among us you are all equal. That is, we are all in a common relationship with Jesus Christ.

When I dig into this conversation, my head starts spinning because it seems like too much to address. Here's what I know:

• I know that the church (including me) is called to not only deal with the pain at hand, but to try and address the institutional sin that causes some of the poverty and pain in the world and not to enable it further with straight handouts.
  
• I know that the more I make, the more more my money takes hold of me. A friend from high school, Russ Niesz, said something once that stuck with me today: "We rise to our own level of poverty." Completely true. As my friend Matt and I were running the other day, we saw a pretty poor family fishing on a bridge. We were talking about how for that family, that may be a great vacation, but our kids would think it was the worst ever. We change our standards and it just keeps getting more and more expensive.
• I know that the more I give away and the less I'm connected to my stuff, the more free I am.
• I don't have all the answers, and I still don't like huge taxes, because at the end of the day, I don't think the government is very good and efficient at spending my money.

Twitter for business

Excellent presentation on how to use twitter in businesses:

Twitter For Business

View more presentations from iangreen.

Happy Birthday Emily!

Birthday dinner at Red Robin for Emily!

View from our hotel on South Beach

Cathie is not topless on south beach

She is the exception.

Jons worst nightmare

I'm pretty sure it was immoral or illegal for Cathie to feed them left
overs of her chicken sangwich. They wouldn't get away from the car.
Jon almost stayed another day

Crazy Cat Guy aka Jon in 40 years

Key West Sunset

Long Neck Guy at Sunset, Again

The Key West Mile High Club

Chillaxing in the sun in Key West

The theme of our Key West Trip

Was this the wrong rental car for the four of us?

Cultural Implications of Twitter

I'm absorbed in the whole social networking scene: blogging, facebooking, twittering... My life is pretty much out there and through the above, I'm able to stay pretty well connected at a surface level with the world around me. My friend Jason Shinn summed it up well, and I quote him often with this: "Do we really need more ways to say nothing?" There's goodness associated with putting my life out there, but really, isn't it kind of self-absorbed?


This article entitled Twitter - What's it doing to us? talks about how self-absorbed we (me) have become and the implications of all of this information flying us constantly:

There's also some fairly disturbing indications that this growing self-absorption may be dulling our society's conscience. Researchers at the National Academy of Sciences have found that the lightning pace of media brought on by Facebook feeds and Twitter has made the average person increasingly indifferent to human suffering. Constant updates give us little time to reflect upon the information we're receiving. The study found that humans have the capacity to sort information very quickly, but complex reactions like compassion or admiration take much longer to process. When we're constantly inundated with tiny bits of information, we rarely take time to think or feel deeply about it.

Lola looks ridiculous

Cathie took Lola to get her haircut today and you can see how it
turned out. She was so matted the groomer had to shave her bald. She
now looks exactly like the kind of dog I never wanted. The cat is
taking advantage of Lola's new overgrown-rat size by beating up on her
even more so.

Easter Sunday @ Crossroads (a little late)

I love Easter weekend at my church, Crossroads. We've been going here for around 14 years I think, and have so many friends and memories and relationships here. I've been transferring old pictures and video and it's been cool to see the people change over the course of the years in some of these pictures. I brought my camera on Sunday to get some pictures of people.

We've got this amazing group of friends at our church, people like the niemis, the muzzi/ickes the girards and the workman-harmons (apparently hyphenating your name is cool at our church). It's also cool to see old youth group kids like courtney... Who I hadn't seen in years.

This was our second easter in our new building, and we're starting to figure out how to really use the space. We had a great choir and a full house.

I happened to have my camera as I looked over and saw Em standing with Cathie and singing. I love this picture!

All in all, Easter is my favorite holiday. I love the time of reflection that leads up to it, the fact that I step back in awe and think of the implications of Jesus dying on the cross and then rising again three days later... I always think of Tony Campolo's message: It's Friday, but Sunday's coming.

The Smartest Thing Brad Has Ever Said

Let's take the way-back machine to a winter where Brad had just bought a $50k new wake-boarding boat. Let's just say he had high expectations. Very high. One night while in Ted's basement watching a sporting event, Brad made a rather funny joke about the odd's of Will actually finding a woman like Monaca in the world. Next thing we knew, Will had lovingly tossed Brad to the ground as we all heard an nasty popping noise. That popping noise was Brad's shoulder coming out of the socket and the noise of Brad's dreams of being able to wake-board that summer being crushed.

My friend Brad is old. Very old. With that super-oldness comes the occasional great nugget of wisdom. One of the things he taught me about ten years ago was this simple saying, "Expectations are resentments waiting to happen". I ran across this mathematical representation of Brad's wisdom. He told me this after I returned from my first vacation with two small kids. To date, my expectations of vacation were kicking back in a chair on the beach, enjoying a cold beer or two and having fun. My first family vacation with kids was NOTHING like that. Any time I've got a big event coming up, Brad will chime in with the phrase, "Sounds like you have some pretty high expectations." To which I'll try and try and reset things and make sure that I'm good with whatever comes my way.

I say this because Cathie and I are heading to Key West on Thursday night, along with Jon and Beth. It should be a great week, great weather, great company. I'm trying to lower my expectations and make sure that I can enjoy the moment.

How I Want to Live My Life

From the indexed blog:

Playing Fetch

At this morning's workout we played human fetch. The last time we did this, I busted my ankle and the other guy ended up throwing-up multiple times. This one consisted of myself, Alex, Kirk and Dave.

The workout goes like this: One person stands at one end of the gym with a bucket of tennis balls next to them. The first round of tennis balls are thrown about 10-15 feet out, just out of your reach and you have to grab them before the first bounce. It's a lot of quick, explosive sprinting and basically feeling like a dog. Once you're nice and winded, you have to get ten without missing before you're done.

The next round is about 30-40 feet and you have to catch it after the first bounce. This was brutal. The positive aspect is that you're so focused on pushing yourself just far enough to get the next ball that you don't think about how you're dying from all the sprinting.

The exercise was brutal, pushing each person just beyond what they thought they could do. The cooler part was watching how the group of guys treated each other during this. This group of guys is pretty brutal in terms of mockery and sarcasm. Nothing is really sacred: dead mothers, sexual preferences, illegitimate children, family heritage, race, religion... You name it, we will make fun of it. While the guy was chasing balls, you could tell when the guy had hit a wall, and all the guys responded by encouraging the ball-chaser along in a positive, real way. It's something Kirk (the owner) models well for all of us, and it makes all the difference in the world. When you're just at the edge and your brain and body are telling you to stop, encouraging words can make all of the difference to get that extra 10%.

The same probably goes with encouraging words that we offer to people as they're being pushed to the edge by life. That little extra effort to send a note, txt message, phone call or in person can make the difference between quitting or continuing.

Seeing my kids grow up

As I'd mentioned here last year, seeing my youth group kids grow up is a cool thing. I had a beer Friday night with two of them and it always makes me smile. I like being a part of the same church for so long and the way it allows me stay connected to the kids. Two of my 8th graders in my youth group are friends of ours kids that I visited their parents in the hospital when they were born and held them as babies. Kinda cool. They always ask the same question: "Is it weird buying me a beer?" My response: "Not as weird as it would be if I were buying you crack."

I'm in the process of transferring over old videos to my computer and I keep stumbling across these great memories from youth ministry stuff over the past 10-12 years. I've been watching the road rally's, mud bowls, youth group meetings and camps seeing these kids who are now grown up, a bunch of whom I'm still connected to via Facebook. Makes me wonder how they're doing and how God is growing the seeds we planted. With junior high kids, it's all about the marathon - watching kids go past their high school/college rebellion and eventually revisit their faith.

I came across the video from a surprise 30th birthday party that Cathie and my friends threw for me. It was one that I'd dreaded because I thought it would make me irrelevant to kids in terms of youth ministry. I've gotten over that.

I found a video of Noel from 1999 when he'd come and taught at my youth group on the topic of God in music. Even ten years ago he still had this great, edgy approach to the topic that set aside conventional wisdom and went back to God's word in a fresh new way. I'm pretty sure he still has the Cheerios shirt he was wearing in the video.

Teddy the Caterpillar

Em found a new pet. She claimsshra taught him to do tricks like roll
over.

Running for my life

I just got back from an 8 mile run, at an average pace of about an 8 minute/mile. I just noticed that today is my one year running anniversary. Exciting, huh? You probably feel bad not having gotten me a gift.

I was looking back today trying to figure out when I started running and came across this post one year ago today:

On Wednesday I ran about 1 1/2 miles in 12 minutes and it was miserable. Today I ran about 3 1/4 miles in about 30 minutes and it wasn't quite as bad (not quite as good as my Nephew). Apparently if you run really hard for a mile and half and you're not in shape, things don't go so well. If you pace yourself, you can go a bit further I guess. It was sunny, I had the right music on and took my brother-in-law Kevin's advice to go into it with a good additude.

When I started running, I hated it. Despised it really. Kinda like my friend Kirk. After Kevin's advice to "fake it 'til you make it" we set the goal to run a half marathon together at the end of last year, which we did. Running is now a part of my routine which I really enjoy as both a form of exercise and a stress-reliever. I ran through this past winter which kept me in good enough shape to start this year in good enough shape to run 7 or 8 miles without much effort at a pace that took me most of last year to work up to.

I don't have any race goals in mind this year except doing a triathlon. I can bike and run without a problem. My big fear is the swimming. After having minor panic attacks when I tried distance swimming in the lake water where I couldn't touch, I need to take some kind of lessons.

After last year's half-marathon, I had no desire to do another one. I may sign up for one this year, though, just to have a goal. I'd like to beat my time last year of 1h 57m. I'd like to do a race with Nate now that he's running with me starting with a 5k.

I bought last year's running shoes at New Balance, where they really know what they're talking about. I put a slew of miles on them and this year thought I'd save a few bucks and buy them at Dick's sporting goods, because I figured I knew what I needed. What an dumb move. I bought a very nice pair of Asics, but obviously the wrong ones. I'm having problems with numbness and soreness. The soreness is just due to changing to a new style of shoe, but I just can't get these to fit right as I run. They feel fine until I get about a mile into it.

In my post a year ago, I joked:

I'm thinking I can somehow turn this into a reason (excuse?) to get the new 3G iPhone and the Nike GPS connector.

One year later, i've got an iPhone with the built in GPS connectivity and the RunKeeper app. It's an amazing app that tracks your speed, route, elevation and talks to you periodically to tell you how you're doing. I typically listen to NPR Podcasts (This American Life, Planet Money) or Noel or Rob Bell's messages, or the occasional book on tape.

My friend Kirk likens new-found runners to new ex-smokers. Kirk hates running as much as I did, but has signed up for a marathon at the end of this year to motivate himself. He has run once since then. He hates the fact that a lot of the guys who work out together have started running and have far better cardiovascular endurance than him. He may die as he runs the marathon, but he'll have gone out with a bang.

The Many Faces of Maddie @ Ripley